Making Divorce Support Groups Work for You

By: Sam Summers

Divorce can be a very isolating experience. It can cut you off from friends that either do not understand what you're going through, or friends who still maintain a friendship with your former spouse. Joining one of the many divorce support groups out there, however, can decrease this sense of isolation, as there is definitely strength in numbers. All support groups are known to help increase your level of self-confidence following a traumatic experience, and there is no argument against the fact that divorces can be quite traumatic. You do not have to suffer alone, and you do not have to suffer in silence.

It's a safe bet to say that many of us feel some degree of guilt after a divorce we feel guilty that we could not hold our marriage together. Joining one of the divorce support groups can help you to address these feelings of guilt, and will let you understand that you are not alone in feeling this way. You will learn that much the same way as it takes two people to make a marriage work, it also takes two people to cause that marriage to fail. So, especially if you did not do something wholly unacceptable that contributed to the reasons for your divorce, the benefit of divorce support groups is, again, to let you know that you are not alone.

Another way that divorce support groups can help you is in addressing the loss of self-esteem that occurs naturally during the process of a divorce. The foundation that you need in order to build your self-assurance will come from an unconditional acceptance of the other members of the group, each of whom has gone through the exact thing that you're going through, and each of whom have experienced this same loss of self-assurance. You will be helped to realize that you are still a worthy person who is deserving of a relationship wherein you are accepted and recognized as being worthwhile. The entire premise of divorce support groups is to allow you to recover without the fear that you will be judged for what actions you took or didn't take that contributed to the divorce.

Anger and sadness are also normal emotions for all of us post-divorce, and the unconditional acceptance of the other members of divorce support groups has the added benefit of helping you to conquer these feelings. You can look upon the other members of your group as equals, and that is very important when you are trying to overcome such debilitating emotions. Because the people you will be sharing your feelings with have been where you are, and some of them have already worked through this stage, they will be able to provide you with methods for coping that you probably won't be able to think of on your own.

Finally, because laughter really is the best medicine, you should know that very often meetings of people in divorce support groups have the benefit of finding the humor in what seems like a very humorless situation. Yes, you are going through a dark time, but that doesn't mean that you have to approach it with a hang-dog attitude, and lightening things up is just one of the many benefits of finding and attending meetings of one of the available divorce support groups.

Reprinted from: Communication Skills Articles.

Sam Summers is a staff writer for several relationship advice online publications. She focuses on dating advice, marriage advice, divorce support groups and infidelity.

Please Rate this Article

5 out of 54 out of 53 out of 52 out of 51 out of 5 

Not yet Rated

Additional Articles From - Home | Relationships | Divorce