When to Turn to Marriage Therapy

By: Mike Justin

Marriage has the description of being the sacred union. As it should be. Because when the new married couple says "I do" what they are saying is they will be together till death do them part. Even through bad times, like sickness and poorer.
You will notice the health and richer part I left out. Because often times, those times are the easy.
But regardless of the situation, if you find your marriage in trouble, keeping a marriage happy and healthy can become a struggle. It is during this time a family therapist might be the best option.
Because once problems start to become chronic, this could lead to a road that ends in divorce. Problems such as fighting, not trusting, no intimacy, despising each other, etc.
When things like that do start happening, the best single thing a couple can do is seek a marriage therapist. Why? Because even though it doesn't feel like it is to the couple, most therapists have seen everything. And from their experience they can use it to help the couples in their troubled marriage.
So why does marriage therapy or couples therapy work? Well I would like to share some insights from my experience as a marriage therapist.
Several factors starting with safety. A good therapist is able to provide the troubled couple with an environment that a couple can feel safe in. An environment that they are not used to where they have their fights.
This prevents the usual angry or hysterical outbursts that occur in a familiar environment.
Second, as mentioned before, they have experience. This allows the therapist to share whether or not what the couple is going through is normal.
Third, they can help with communications. Often that is one of the huge reasons for a troubled marriage. When trouble happens, each person usually becomes defensive and the line of communication becomes difficult. The therapist can help in making sure those lines are open.
Fourth, they will be helpful to the couples in regards to problem solving skills. Obviously, there are issues. And the more equipped the couple is, the better they will be able to solve their issues.
Finally, they are able to help the married couple to better understand the situation. They do this through helping them in listening, sharing feelings that may be difficult to express, and then interpret it all.
As you can tell, when their is trouble in the marriage, often the best way to fix it is through therapy. If you do find your situation is similar to this, go seek some help. Take it from my experience doing marriage counseling.

Reprinted from: Communication Skills Articles.

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